Category Archives: Foster

a moment captured

Foster, Jonah, Katie, memories, motherhood, Parker, Theodore August 8, 2013 Leave a comment
 

It’s not often that I catch a picture of all of my babies smiling these big, genuine smiles. I am not a photographer. The lighting is always wrong and their are weird blurry spots where there should be a child. The background is full of unflattering things no one wants to see, like dirty dishes, filled to the brim trashcans or toys randomly thrown about the yard.

I have a couple of friends who take pictures of my kids because we run in the same circles and I look at their pictures and think “that is the most beautiful child in the world” (not that I’m biased).  You’ve seen some of them, I post them on here and tag them on Facebook.

I always do feel a little proud that somehow my husband and I managed to give birth to these little beauties. Well, I feel proud briefly until I have to break up a screaming fist fight before someone ends up bloody. Then, I realize that pictures only tell so much.

I want to frame the pictures from the professionals. They are classy and elegant.

This picture, the one where all of my children have piled into a cardboard box, is the one I want to memorize.

The one I want to stare at and have the image burned into my brain.

I want to be able to smell the smell of summer and dirt. I want to hear the sound of giggling and laughing and jostling one another. I want to see the sight of Foster’s sense of humor, Katie’s desire to please, Theodore’s sweet spirit, Parker’s adoring look at Daddy and Jonah doing his best to imitate his big brother.

Only my pictures, the ones I took, the moments I felt compelled to pick up my camera and “capture” are the ones that can give me all of that. Imperfect as they may be.

reunited (and it feels so good)

daddy, Foster, gratitude, Jonah, Katie, memories, Parker, Theodore, vacation July 23, 2013 1 Comment

Yesterday Chris went back to work at his “real” job.  That’s what we call Daddy’s civilian job.  After he returned from 190 ish days out of the country, we desperately needed that time to adjust to being a family again.

Deployments effect everyone in the family differently. Each of the kids, Chris and I are all getting used to being together again. If your family has never gone through a long separation you could have the false impression that when you are together again it’s all celebration and fun. Most of the time though, the emotions are fluctuating and range from elation to confusion to frustration to joy. 

What I feel, what my kids feel more than anything is relief and security.  A family is meant to be together, separation for any reason feels chaotic and insecure.

I don’t have nearly enough pictures taken to chronicle the past month’s fun. I haven’t been grabbing my camera as often, or blogging. Hopefully, now that we are getting back to “normal” I’ll be able to spend time on those things.

 

 
 

 

war camp 2013

field trip, Foster, history July 23, 2013 1 Comment

Foster had the opportunity to attend a week long day camp last week where he learned all about the French and Indian war.

His favorite parts of the week were the battles that took place on the teacher’s property with water balloons, getting to watch The Last of the Mohicans with daddy and the field trip to Fort Loudon on Saturday.

saying yes for 50 bucks or less

Foster, parenting, unschooling June 8, 2013 Leave a comment

I have a really bad habit of saying no to my kids. 

Let me explain.

Yesterday, we went to a fairly large public park in Knoxville. We were meeting a friend and her son and decided we would start at the playground and then move up to a splash pad later.

Foster had been there previously and knew there was a pier on a lake not far away. He had hung out with some other boys a few days before and really wanted to go check out the pier again.

I told him that was fine. I just let him know that if we weren’t at the playground when he got back, we would be at the splash pad up the hill.

He trotted off happily.

I could have handled that differently. I could have demanded that he stay with us, where I could see him, at this playground for small children.

Instead, he came up to the splash pad about 30 minutes later and told me he had helped some guy start his jet ski and watched some other guys fishing but “they didn’t catch anything.”

That yes didn’t cost me a penny. But it meant the world to him. He went, alone, without a cell phone, and made it back alive.

Last night, a neighbor kid was over playing and it started to storm while we were outside burning some tree limbs and playing.

Foster asked to get the umbrellas we have. You know what I said? No.

I bought those at the dollar store for less than 10 bucks and I said NO.

Sometimes I am such an idiot. Imagine if I had said yes? If I had just let them have the umbrellas, there is no telling what they could have experienced or learned, what they could have created or even if they would have broken them and learned from that.

So from now on, I am going to try and say YES.

Well, as long as the thing they want to use or play with is worth less than 50 bucks.

dollywood (again)

field trip, Foster, friends, Katie, Theodore May 31, 2013 Leave a comment

Going to Dollywood never gets old for the kids. What makes it even better? Friends! Oh and funnel cakes.

batter up

Foster, sports, Theodore May 31, 2013 Leave a comment

do what I say

bullying, children, choices, church, Foster May 22, 2013 Leave a comment

One thing I have realized in the short 9 years I have been a parent is that, like many things in life, you must be willing to evolve.

This is easier for some personalities than others. If you have a type A personality (as both my husband and I tend to have) it makes evolving that much harder.

Another thing that makes changing difficult is the outside pressures all around you.

In church this past Sunday the pastor called everyone who was age 22 and under to come up on the stage. He was relating to the congregation the importance of ministry to young families, children, etc.

Jonah, Parker and Theodore were in their nursery classes, so that left Foster and Katie to go up.

As soon as he made the announcement, Katie bounced right up and headed to the front of the church.

Foster inched closer to my side. I think I could actually see him shrinking. I could tell he didn’t want to go without him saying a word.

I didn’t want to tell him to go, but I knew I “should”.  After all, the pastor had made a request and every other child was going. Our following exchange went like this:

Me: (in a hushed, calm tone) “Go on up there Foster.”

Foster: (in a hushed, bewildered tone) “Why do I have to?”

Me: (in a hushed, forceful tone) “Go now, Foster, because he wants all of you up there.”

Foster: (in a hushed, pleading, frantic tone) “But why, it doesn’t matter if I go up there. He doesn’t need me up there.”

Then the window had passed. All the other kids and young adults were on the stage and the pastor was speaking.

I had several emotions going on. First, I was uncomfortable that the people around me could see my kid didn’t go with the crowd. Second, irritation and a little angry that Foster didn’t just “obey” me. Third, shame that I had tried to bully my own son into doing something that in 20 minutes wouldn’t matter anyway.

Have you ever felt uncomfortable, irritated, angry and ashamed about a situation?

Do you know which emotion is more powerful and least selfish?

Yep. Shame. There was no reason I should have tried to push Foster to do something that was so inconsequential in the grand scheme of life, yet so detrimental to his emotional well being and our relationship.

field day 2013

Foster, homeschooling, Jonah, Katie, Parker, sports, Theodore May 2, 2013 Leave a comment

This is the first year we participated in our local homeschooling group’s field day. The kids had lots of questions but since I only had my past public school experiences to draw on I just shared what was important.

1. “Field Day was one of the best days of the year because it meant school was almost out for summer.”

2. “Field Day was great because we got to spend almost all day outside with our friends.”

3. “Field Day was my favorite because it meant NO school work (and usually NO homework either)!”

I guess you can gather by my responses that I am not very athletic. I didn’t mention trying to win ribbons or win races. I don’t remember ever actually winning anything at field day. I know I enjoyed the 3-legged race the most but I’m not sure why. It could have been my partner was a cute boy. Who knows?

It turns out, they did just fine even though they didn’t know what to expect.

 
We stumbled to the car 5 long, hot hours after we had arrived. We left talking about the ribbons everyone had won, our friends, the fun we had.
Foster said as we were leaving, “that was so much fun! Can we do this every day?”
 
 

smile it’s spring!

Foster, homeschooling, Jonah, Katie, Parker, siblings May 2, 2013 Leave a comment
Cheese!

 
“Are you talkin’ to me?”

 
 

 
So much to explore!

 
Where’s sissy?

 
“I don’t want to go for a walk, AGAIN!”

 
My princess!

 
Getting to know the neighbors.

 
Taking it all in!

bike rodeo

Foster, homeschooling April 3, 2013 Leave a comment

Foster was able to participate in this years bike rodeo for Cub Scouts. The boys had a great time and learned a lot about bike safety. Today when he and his brothers and sister were outside he told them all that he would need to check their helmets and their bikes (or scooters) before they went for a ride. It was great to watch him sharing all the new things he had learned about how to stay safe on the road.