Foster | All the Little Grubbs

Category Archives: Foster

Foster turned 12

Foster February 17, 2016 Comments: 2

You know those parents that just go on and on about how awesome their kid is and you’re like “would you SHUT UP about how awesome your kid is?!?”

Well, so that you don’t want to say that about me, I’ll try to make this short.

Foster is amazing. He rarely ever disobeys or disrespects his father and I. He is honest, giving and loyal. He is a saver, not a spender. He is a thinker. He is happy with a trip to a used bookstore and doughnuts with his close friend as a birthday celebration. He is grateful for what we give him and does not often take his material or emotional blessings for granted.

His intelligence astounds me. His sense of humor brightens every day. He is human and he is a boy so he teases his sister mercilessly but he will help her out if she ever really needs anything. He chooses the company of his father and I. He enjoys playing with his little brothers. He is deliberate in his choice of friends and does not get hung up on fashion or what is popular.

If I had to name any flaw in him at this time I would say he is too critical of himself. He does not have confidence in his own gifts and abilities and that causes him to have an “I can’t do it” attitude. This is hard to watch as a mother and even harder to know how to combat and teach him to overcome.

I am beyond thankful that I have gotten to be his mother and know him as a person for these past 12 years.

9,312 words and healing

Foster, Grammy, Grandad, gratitude, writing November 9, 2014 1 Comment

So I am up to 9,312 words! I should be further along now, according to the NaNoWriMo charts, but I’m pretty excited that I’ve gotten this far. The characters are coming to me and they are slowly developing. I’m letting them go where they want to, because as far as plot goes, I really have NO plot. I have some vague ideas but I don’t know if my characters are going to agree with me or not. If they are anything like my children, probably not.

It turns out that Chris was too sick to go hunting this week and weekend so we have had some extra, much needed family time. I was able to have some time out of the house alone on Thursday which is always priceless. Tomorrow, instead of going to church, we are planning on a long drive to find some autumn scenery to enjoy. Tomorrow night we’ll stay in and watch a movie. We were driving to Foster’s soccer practice and I turned to Chris and said “this weekend has been so…healing.” He agreed.

Foster’s last soccer game and end-of-the-season soccer party were today. He received a trophy and ate some doughnuts, it was a nice conclusion to an undefeated season. It’s always nice to be the winners.

My parents came over for dinner this evening and I still feel so thankful that they can just drive over for dinner any time. I’m not sure they’ll bring a dessert to share next time though since my kids ate all the cheesecake before the grown-ups could get any.

one button

Foster, parenting September 15, 2014 Comments: 2

I decided yesterday that I’m not going to tell my son about that button again.

The thing is, when he walked in my room yesterday, fully dressed, needing help with his hair, I zeroed in on that stupid button. I didn’t stop to appreciate that he had fully dressed himself. Not just because he’s 10 now and I don’t have to help him get dressed, but because he has full function of his body and his mind, to be able to do what so many take for granted.

I might have told him “you look nice.” In the next moment though, I shattered it. The building up, the comfort and security of being seen and appreciated by someone who loves you, with my stupid focus on that button.

“You sure you don’t want to unbutton that top button?” I asked. The room felt heavier immediately with tension and judgment and criticism. We’d been down this road before, even if I’d tried to keep it light-hearted and tried to explain why people just don’t button that button, it didn’t matter.

“Why should I? Are you saying I look bad?”

“No, it’s just…it just looks…well, a little dorky.”

My son I should be learning from, not teaching, says, “Who cares? I like it this way. It’s useless to unbutton it.”

He is right. I know he is right. There are a lot of times when buttoning that top button might be important. A job interview let’s say or his wedding day. But not right now. Not when he’s 10 and heading to worship a God who doesn’t care what he’s wearing.

So yesterday was it. If someone does think that he looks like a nerd, or a dork, or whatever the going term is for someone who isn’t dressed just like everyone else and they make that known, I’ll be reminded that having a kid who doesn’t care whatever one else thinks about his fashion choices is really the better thing.

spring 2014

daddy, field trip, Foster, gratitude, holiday, homeschooling, Jonah, Katie, memories, motherhood, Parker, potty-training, priorities, siblings, sports, Theodore, Toddlers August 18, 2014 Leave a comment

Foster is 10

Foster, memories February 24, 2014 Leave a comment

Getting some extra Wii time the morning of his 10th birthday.

Cake that Foster and Daddy picked out during their special Daddy/Foster time.

And she really is! She took half of the money from her piggy bank ($21) to put in the
birthday card she had made for Foster. She loves her big brother so much.

That’s almost a real smile!

Photo by Katie

Lego Minecraft = Mommy made a great choice!

Foster’s Lovey says farewell

Foster, growing-up, memories February 14, 2014 Leave a comment

Dear Foster,

You went to bed without me tonight. I know you have been saying for awhile now that you don’t need me, that you aren’t a “baby”. I started to think back to the beginning…February 14th, 2004 when we first met. Your mommy was really into those parenting books and one of them must have said something about an “attachment object” so that a new baby would feel a sense of security. I guess that’s why some people call them security blankets. Your mommy called me your lovey. She got you as a baby shower gift and since she didn’t know then if you would be a boy or a girl…you were stuck with my color – light yellow. Although, I don’t really look all that yellow now…ten years (or 3,650 nights later) I look sort-of grayish yellow…all pulled strings and worn places.

I knew your mommy was onto something when you started to sort of pick at the fuzz on me and suck your thumb. I felt pretty happy that I could provide you with comfort when you were hurt, help you relax at nap time and keep you company through the nights. I know there was at least one night that we spent apart, you still had your thumb but I’m sure it wasn’t the same, otherwise your mommy wouldn’t have asked your Grammy to overnight express me back from her house!

We’ve been through some great times together…six years of thumb sucking, sometimes picking at my fuzzy side and sometimes petting my silky side. I know it was hard, giving up that thumb and making all those big transitions you’ve made in life. Man, each time your mommy had another baby you were treated as older and bigger, but when you and I hung out at night, in the quiet of your room, it was like old times…when you were the little one.

Then there were the really scary and sad times…when your Daddy was gone to Columbia, Iraq, Kuwait…the really long trips. The time you broke your collar bone and the time you had a stomach virus so bad you ended up in the hospital. When your Nana died and you didn’t understand it all.

I was glad you shared with me when you gave your life to Jesus, right after praying with your mommy and daddy in the living room…I was so relieved that you had found the true Lovey.

What I appreciate about you the most is that during the day you let me play all kinds of things with you…games like “smack my sister” and when you would wad me up and use me as a bomb. It was fun times buddy, fun times.

I know that when you started reading and praying at night I wasn’t as necessary as before but I was honored to still be a part of your life. You are growing up and I know I need to let you go.

I thank you Foster Owen Grubb for sharing a part of your life with me. I know that your mommy will put me away in a safe place, a place for all those truly, one-of-a-kind special things that have defined your life and hers.

Farewell dear friend,

Foster’s Lovey

I’m sure they learned something today

Foster, homeschooling, humor, imagination, Jonah, Katie, Parker, Theodore February 11, 2014 Leave a comment

Sometimes with homeschooling you just have to roll with it. You’re tired. Or they are tired.

This morning right after breakfast, Parker (age 4) decided he would pull out a couple of his 24 piece puzzles and then couldn’t find a piece.

That’s really how it all started. Then Foster started to help him find his piece in the puzzle cabinet and noticed that some of the boxes were falling apart. Foster pulled out a 300 piece puzzle and put it on the bar to work. I got out my sharpie and big Ziploc bags and started cutting up the broken boxes to get organized. Then Katie and Theodore decided they wanted to play with the beans…but then they wanted to do puzzles when Jonah wanted the beans…

And so forth and so on…then there was playing with Legos, watching Magic School Bus, popcorn and animal crackers for lunch and a story before rest time.

I’m sure they learned something today.

(Wanted to include the knocked over basket of cardboard, the basket of dirty laundry and
you can’t make them out but the sink is full of dirty dishes too.)