Chris was 21 and I was 25 when we married.  Our whole dating and engagement was about 15 months long. To us that was a LONG time to wait. You see we were striving to really wait. In all the ways that we felt God wanted us to – physically, financially, not living together.

Spiritually and emotionally we had so much to work through.  We both had relationship junk from our pasts and we decided to seek out a Christian counselor for our pre-marital counseling.  We ended up REALLY going.  I know some couples see their pastor or minister for a couple of sessions but we went to this counselor for months.  We would cry and yell and laugh and question why on earth we thought we could make this work. 

What we started to learn in the time before we were married and what we know now more than ever is that no two people can make a marriage work.  I know why the divorce rate is so high, I understand why marriages are breaking up right and left.  Because people put either their wife, husband or kids on the throne in their marriage. 

I’m not sure if it was during pre-marital counseling or just in a message when I heard it described like this :

1. That to have success in marriage you need to draw a triangle.
2. Your husband and yourself are each at one base corner.
3. God is at the top point. 
4. As you individually draw closer to God, then you start to grow closer to one another.

This is probably the biggest lesson that Chris and I have learned over the last 10 years and one that we are continuing to learn. 

Well, that and I shouldn’t comment on his driving or parenting and he shouldn’t comment on how clean the house is or whether dinner is ready on time.

I look at those pictures and see how skinny and young we both were but I wouldn’t go back for anything.  We have put a lot of hard work into being able to enjoy where we are now and we are looking forward to all that is to come!